I am now entering a world into which I have never been. I am not a blogger (until this moment), I have only ever read a handful of blogs aside from work, and I really don’t spend much time on the computer. I do spend time thinking about things and contemplating the time in which we are living, current events, and the world our kids will be inheriting. I also think about all the other stuff we parents worry about. I have opinions on most subjects, some unshakable, others more open to evolution through experience and education. I am humble and don’t consider myself an expert on most any subject. It tends to take me back a little when someone really wants to know what I think.
When Julie and I began to talk about launching The Undivided Divorce my first thought was, “Why would anybody want to hear what I have to say?” I have not received any advanced formal education and I hold no degrees or positions of esteem. I am just a regular guy, working hard and doing what I can to be a good father and husband (among other things). I am not in a position to tell anybody how to live or what to do. I have my own issues. What I can do is share my experience and hope that I can help someone through the bits of wisdom I have picked up or steer them away from some of the mistakes I have made.
I have made some bad decisions in my life and a few good ones too. I have enjoyed a few successes and embarked on some adventures that became miserable failures. There are a few things in each of us that are foundational to our character and who we are. Like many men, I came to fatherhood more or less kicking and screaming, and once I became a dad, I found myself with a whole new cornerstone in the bedrock of my foundation. I realized that I was trusted with a whole new level of responsibility, a duty which opened my heart in ways I never knew possible. I was absolutely clueless that becoming a father would lead me to feel love at a depth I never knew existed. With that I became fully committed to doing the best I could. Sometimes I fail, sometimes I feel like the worst dad ever, but because the call of duty is so high and the love is so deep, even when I feel down, I find the inner strength to do my best. Some days my best isn’t as good as I want it to be but that doesn’t mean I am any less committed.
So who AM I, why am I here and what am I doing? I am just a dad, a parent like any of you, doing what I can every day to raise my kids and pray they come out okay. I am a guy who is willing to put myself out there and share some of my most intimate feelings and experiences in the hopes that someone may find a little peace or perhaps benefit from some of my struggles. I am passionate about doing what I can to help people build better relationships with their exes for the sake of the innocents who have had their lives shattered by divorce, their children. I am a strong advocate for children of divorce and I am here to help divorced parents find a way to act like grownups and rise to the responsibility and honor all adults are given when they become parents.
I'm looking forward to interacting with you here. I have no doubt we have much to learn from one another.